CAMERON WITH SANTA

I know a kid that just won the award for CUTEST 9yr OLD TO TAKE A PIC WITH SANTA ~ He's stinking handsome! Take a look for yourself and you be the judge.

LETTER FROM KYLE

Saturday I received a letter from Kyle. I will give you a short version of it~
Momma,
I'm sorry I have not called or written in such a long time. I really can't express to you the way I am feeling. I wake up every morning felling like a failure. I failed my family, failed my friends and I've failed myself. I feel like I have no hope for the future any more, like all things are lost for me. I've gone too long pretending to be ok with being away from my loved ones. * there are parts where he is very angry that I will not share * I am an emotional mess. It's like the only things I feel now are anger and sorrow. I'm just to the point I'm starting to lose hope. My intentions of writing you this letter were not to hurt you or make you cry. I just don't want you to think I forgot about you. I love you. I am sorry I ever put you through all this shit and caused you so much pain, you did nothing to deserve it. Your the best mom a kid could ever ask for I just blew it. I love you - KYLE KING
please don't come this weekend.

***********MY RESPONSE***********

This has bothered me all weekend. Just knowing your child is in so much pain is excruciating in itself. I cried the majority of the day Saturday after reading the letter. I had planned to drive to see Kyle and take Mike & Cameron too. Despite my better judgment I respected his wishes. We did not go for the visit. It's been a few weeks since I have seen Kyle. I think it was my birthday weekend to be honest. He's asked us not to come. It's like he is punishing himself but what he does not understand is it's punishing us as well. I hate to tell him that because the last thing I want is to hurt him more. I feel stuck and helpless. I'm his mother and the very least I should do is try to make him happy. I can hardly type this my eyes are filled with tears. I am so hurt that I wish I could find comfort myself. I wrote him a letter last night. I tried everything humanly possible to get the point across to him that he is NOT A FAILURE. He's had a minor setback in his life. I also said that I don't believe mistakes make people into failures it's when we don't learn from those mistakes that we fail ourselves. I believe this and I want him to as well. I wish I had the perfect words that would speak to him. I say the same things over and over to him in hopes he understands and takes something more from it than just words on paper. I can't bare the thought of him giving up on himself. I am at a loss and wishing I knew what more I could do other than sending letters and cards almost daily. My heart breaks for him. It honestly does.

I did a little shopping for him so he would not feel left out this Christmas. I got him a few large books of puzzles and mind games. He requested something like that already. I also got him 2 more books. One by Dean Koonts the author he really likes. The other about a football player. Then I got a book for him to do daily starting January 1st. Its a positive saying or quote book. Hopefully this will help at least he'd be reading something good once a day. That is my hopes.
I tried to make it festive for him too. I wrapped everything in tissue paper and tied bows. I am not even sure if this is allowed but I wanted him to have at least something to open during Christams week. I've sent two & three cards and letters a day the last two weeks trying to share the Christmas spirit with him and make sure he knows one thing- I LOVE & MISS HIM DEARLY.

UGLY CHRISTMAS SWEATER PARTY PICS

I wanted to share pictures with everyone! I had a really good time this year at the party. I want to thank my goofy friends for participating with the theme. Everyone came in tacky sweaters even my friend from Tennessee. Okay I lied~ we had an extra in reserve and she happily wore it! All the gifts brought were great. We all had a good time stealing from each other and the ornaments were fab as always.
~ I LOVE YOU GIRLS~

ANDREA'S TACKY SWEATER CHRISTMAS PARTY 2009

~ HAD TO DO SILLY FACES ~ THAT'S HOW WE ROLL ~

The Lovely DIANA HARDEMAN & THE HOSTESS WITH THE MOSTEST
(Come on guys, you know that's funny)

CINDY ANDES ~ ME ~ JANICE MOSIER


CHRIS CRABTREE ~ SANDRA THOMAS ~ NANCY BARTLING


DIANA & TERRI HARDEMAN


ME & VANESSA JOHNSON


BROOKE PEARCE took home the award for BEST OVER ALL TACKIEST OUTFIT~


CHRIS CRABTREE took home the award for BEST TACKY SWEATER.
She went out of her way to rig her sweater with her own lighting system.
AWESOME JOB CHRIS!!! LOVE IT!!


The award for "MAKING A TACKY CHRISTMAS SWEATER LOOK GOOD"
goes to CINDY ANDES ~ You go girl!


NANCY BARTLING singing for her prize~


TERRI dancing for her gift ~ bust a move!
I see NANCY GARCIA in the background wishing it were her dancing!


Played a little game of unwrap the present with oven mitts!



LORI WHITTERN was the winner of a mani or pedi.

Don't get too attached CINDY. FYI: That blanket stayed home with me!
I totally stole it from her playing dirty Santa!

OH YES! Love the hat JANICE MOSIER!


Some hot COUGAR mommas
VANESSA JOHNSON, JANICE MOSIER & CYNDI RAMIREZ


ME & BARBARA ADAMS
(She was in town for her father's surgery)
It's been too long sister ~ I miss you!


US AGAIN


ME & DIANA

TERRIFIC KID AWARD

THE TERRIFIC KID AWARD GOES TO ~ CAMERON ASH!!!

I could not be more proud of this little boy. He shows good behavior, makes very good grades and does what is asked of him by his teachers. He is a caring boy who is always willing to help other students. I am proud he's mine!!!

Yesterday was terrific kids day at Northmoor Elem. The parents were invited to share lunch with their terrific kid. Cameron wanted McDonald's so McDonald's it was.

THE EVER GROWING WISH LIST

After shopping for goodies for my party I decided I needed to make a wish list. Why not. I know Mike reads this and there will be zero confusion. ENJOY.

I have wanted one of these Tiffany scroll bracelets for a long time. I think I am due. If I don't get this I may just use some Christmas money and buy it for myself!


@ Dillard's~ Fossil Faux Tortoise Boyfriend Watch


Goes without saying~ MUST HAVE TO ADD TO THE COLLECTION
of over 80 bottles of perfume.


I could use a personal trainer to help motivate me to get off my ass.
Lord knows I need all the help I can get in that area. I figure if you pay for it you are bound to use it and stick to it. Maybe that's just useful thinking on my part too.....



I know! I know! It's an Ove' Glove and YES I WANT ONE!!!



Everlon Diamond Knot Pendent. I think it's BEAUTIFUL!!!



I just LOVE this particular style coach bag! I think I deserve this!!!


The thrifty shopper in me came out for this one. It's $498 on Coach's website.
Saw it at Sam's while Christmas shopping 12/21/09 for $299. You do the math!





WHILE MAKING A WISH LIST THIS BEAUTY SHOULD APPEAR!
2010 Ford Taurus ~ I know who would have thought a Taurus, right??
I saw one at my friend's house and LOVED it!


I don't want to hear a word about this! My brownies are never this perfect.
I WANT THIS DARN THING!!!!


ZAMBEZI ~ 16 piece set (2)


SOHO LOUNGE SQUARE RED ~ 16 piece (2)


CANOPY SQUARE WHITE PORCELAIN
16 piece set (2)

IT'S THE LITTLE THINGS

Today was a great day to say the very least!!!

I achieved goal #1 ~ get my house ready for the holiday season. I started with finally getting the main tree in the living room decorated. It's my version of a mini winter wonderland. It has bright colored snowflakes on a white ribbon as garland. Then layers in nothing but hats, sweaters, mittens, snowflakes & SNOWMEN!! I only displayed about 1/4 of the snowmen I usually display. Maybe next year I'll get an earlier jump on my decorating. The stockings are hung on the mantel that is also full of snowmen and plenty of white lights. I love the snowmen because they do not have to come down right after Christmas Day. Snow does not end just because Christmas is over.

I must comment on this picture because I just love how at peace Mr. King is on the couch. That is exactly how I feel now that my house is festive. I just want to lay on the couch and stare off and think about good times. Like how much fun my boys have had at home on Christmas mornings past or how we would turn out all the lights and lay around the living room just using the glow from the tree and decorations while watching Christmas movies.
Is most definatly the little things that mean the most to me during this season.

The remainder of the day was spent baking, taste testing and girl talk with Cyndi. I made quite a mess with the flour and I must say that stirring is not an easy task. The more stuff you add to the batter the harder it gets to stir. I know my arm will be sore tomorrow. We made fudge (never attempted before in my life), no bake cookies, chocolate chip cookies w/pecans & oatmeal cookies w/coconut & pecans. I sure enjoyed hanging out with Cyndi today. It was much needed. Remember she has a cute website with lots of great food ideas and a blog. Check it out!
WWW.CUPCAKESANDCASSEROLES.COM

15 DAYS UNTIL CHRISTMAS

Let me start with this, everything in my house is upside down and overwhelming. I've had good intentions but something is missing. Then as I'm comfy & cozy watching TV I hear them say 15 days until Christmas. WHAT??? I can do the math but for some reason hearing it got to me JUST NOW!!

I stayed positive all day at the office actually looking forward to getting home so I could decorate for the season and enjoy the finished product with my family. Ooppss got too cozy. Facebook was entertaining and I got in touch with a girl I went to elementary school with. It did not take much to distract me from what obviously needs to be finished.

I usually have this all completed the weekend of Thanksgiving. Here's the thing. My husband has had the lights up since the first 1st of December. He even took all my bins (0ver 10) down from the attic in hopes I would do the rest. He's done his part! My house is usually a snowman's haven. I am a collector. Everyone knows too so I feel doubly obligated. I can tell you almost every ornament that was given to me by who and at what event. I know weird but that's me!! I just don't have the oomph or spirit this year. I've put more effort into this post then I have my decorating. As I type this Mike has fallen asleep and snoring next to our poor pathetic non decorated tree. I took advantage of the moment. He will appreciate me for it too.

I NEED A DRASTIC SHOT OF HOLIDAY FESTIVENESS!!

My house has to go through a major transformation and quickly. I am hosting a party next Tuesday for the love of everything unholy. Somethings got to give! I feel guilty and even embarrassed.

MY NANNY

I was going through old emails this morning. When I say old I have stuff saved from back in 2004 people. I am a cyber pack rat if you will. Always in fear of deleting a picture of a loved one, sporting event or holiday that I need to add to the scrapbook. I'm weird like that. * DON'T EVEN BOTHER ASKING HOW FAR BEHIND I AM WITH ANY OF THOSE PROJECTS * What sparked my interest to start cleaning out the inbox was a recipe my Nanny sent me. I wanted to share it with a friend for her website. Little did I know at the time that it would be the last recipe she'd share with me.

Every Christmas my Nanny would have a spread of homemade goodies that was out of this world. Everyone knew she'd come with tubs of peanut brittle, fudge, chocolate covered pretzels, & Saltine Toffee . We'd all sit around and eat until we wanted to bust.
Here is a recipe she sent me on December 26, 2004.
We lost Melba LaNell (Pope) Aebischer on January 28, 2005.
~ I hope you enjoy these tasty little treats~

I dearly miss Nanny. I think of her often and catch myself wanting to call her to fill her in on something or update her on life. Now she beats me to that. I just wish I could talk to her like I did. She always knew what to say even if it was not what I wanted to hear. She was my counselor, my friend, my teacher and my "Nanny". I hope to one day have half the strength she had when it came to dealing with life's little situations.

SALTINE TOFFEE

37 saltine crackers
1 cup of butter
3/4 cups sugar
2 cups (12oz) semi-sweet chocolate chips
1 oz white morsels
1 tsp shortening

Place crackers in a single layer in a foil lined 15X10X1" baking pan.
In a sauce pan bring butter and sugar to a boil.
Reduce heat, simmer (uncovered) for 5-6 minutes or until mixture is thickened & sugar is completely dissolved. Spread over crackers.
Bake 350 degrees for 7-8 minutes until bubbly.
Sprinkle with chips. Back 3-5 minutes longer or until chips begin to melt, spread chocolates evenly over top.
Melt white chips and shortening, drizzle over toffee. Let chill until set.
Break into pieces. Store in a tight container.

Makes about 1-3/4 lbs

If you like to crochet I have a handwritten pattern that my nanny also made for me. This is yet another memory I will never let go of. In 2004 my boys and I went to spend Thanksgiving with the Aebishcher's. We also went shopping, cooked a lot of home cooked meals, slept (one of my favorite things to do at Nanny's house ~it's just so peaceful & relaxing) and watched the boys fish. We went for a few long drives which is when Nanny and I talked the most other than sitting at the kitchen table when the kids were in bed. That weekend we also celebrated Papa's birthday and welcomed my very first niece, Natalie. She was born 11.25.04. While visiting my Nanny she had a beautiful cream colored crochet blanket on our bed. She made it for us to take home. She also took me to buy new yarn. Any color combo I wanted. She told me she would make any pattern I wanted too. I was so excited because her work was absolutely gorgeous. She told me she'd work on it but with the holidays around the corner it might take awhile. I was in no rush. Just pleased as all get out she was making it for me.

January came and we got the call that Nanny had passed. I had to tell Kyle on his birthday that Nanny was no longer with us (Kyle was on a trip with his church, he came home on his birthday 01/30). Nanny she was laid to rest on Cameron's birthday (02/01). Truly I had never suffered a loss as great as losing her. I was fortunate to still have all my grandparents living. I just hated to ask but I had to......I called my Aunt Edith and said will you please check for a blanket Nanny was working on for me? It was sage & cream. I did not care if it was finished or not I wanted to save it. Edith was very understanding and said honey she had it in the closet with the pattern & a sticky note with my name on it. I just cried and cried. Yet another little something for me to hold on to. It was the most beautiful crochet blanket I've ever seen. I know it was made just for me with much time & love involved.

THANK YOU NANNY FOR BEING SUCH A POSITIVE ROLE MODEL IN MY LIFE! I WILL NEVER FORGET ALL THAT YOU HAVE DONE FOR ME!

*I will scan pattern soon and post below*

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MIKE

~ HAPPY BIRTHDAY MIKE ASH 12.04.09 ~

Guess what this weekend is??? It's the Ash's 34th joint birthday celebration!!
Let me start with first saying we have the greatest boss EVER. The owner & his wife are just the nicest most thoughtful people I have ever met. They took us to lunch last week at Chili's for my birthday. Then this week to Olive Garden for Mike's birthday. THANK YOU GARCIA'S!!!
Then they gave us $$ to spend as we wish. I know what I want.....

This weekend should be fun. We are having friends meet us out at HALF TIME SPORTS GRILL, near Wheatland, OK. I call it Oklahoma City but whatever.......

**pics to follow soon**

OFFICE SPIRIT

I've been a tad out of the loop the first few days of December. Monday was spent trying to get things back in order since the 4 day break (did not get very far). Office was being painted on Tuesday & Wednesday. That was a ton of items taken off the walls, furniture being moved and cleaning where the stuff originally was. OH MY GOSH!! Not my favorite thing to do. Boy did it pay off though. My office looks so much better and I went through a ton of papers and projects I had been meaning to take care of. Feeling a little accomplished. Got to the office today still making heads or tales of my desk did a little paper shuffle but decided a Christmas tree was priority #1.

Tree is up~ lots of gold~making it work. Hopefully this will cheer me up and keep me focused while I am at the office. This picture was taken with my phone. Not the best quality and it looks like the curtain and ribbon are blending together. BOO!

Oh well, the guys like it and it serves its purpose!